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Saturday, February 12, 2011

BLU-RAY REVIEW
You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger
Woody Allen's Cinematic Neuroses, Times Three


Freida Pinto as Dia in Woody Allen's comedy-drama "You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger", on Blu-Ray on Tuesday in the U.S. and Canada. 
Sony Pictures Classics

by Omar P.L. Moore/PopcornReel.com        Follow popcornreel on Twitter FOLLOW
Saturday, February 12, 2011

On Blu-Ray and DVD in three days' time, "You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger" is one of Woody Allen's weakest efforts in years.  Set and shot in London, Mr. Allen unites an ensemble cast of performers, some of whose characters embody the neuroses of Mr. Allen's own movie characters from classic films he's directed in decades past. 

The stories in Mr. Allen's latest film intersect, with art curator Sally (Naomi Watts) and "failed" novelist Roy (Josh Brolin) at a standstill in their rocky marriage, and Sally's mother Helena (Gemma Jones) believing in a fortune teller more than in her own ability to think for herself.  Sally's boss Greg (Antonio Banderas) is married and looking to buy his wife earrings.  Greg brings Sally with him to a jeweller for an expert opinion.  There's Dia (Freida Pinto), who's about to get married and is glimpsed by Roy across the way from his apartment window.  And Alfie (Anthony Hopkins), who divorced Helena, has cast his lot with Charmaine, a prostitute (Lucy Punch).

The film recesses quickly as you feel the desperation of Mr. Allen's clingy characters' quests to gain understanding and find love and belonging.  Each character suffers from a self-centeredness that cripples their own ambitions and destroys others in the process.  In life the best-laid plans are often disasters.  Some of the ensemble characters realize this before it's too late.  Others do not.  Characters spend time chasing their own shadows, as well as other unobtainable objects and beings.  The film fails to vary this approach, so all of the players are essentially doing the same thing, and at the same time.

For the most part "You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger" is clunky, repetitive and generally guilty of having too many stories to tell.  Sizable parts of the film feel unfocused and extraneous, often meandering from the central themes of Mr. Allen's story.  The film's narration by actor Zak Orth is distracting and ill-fitting, throwing us out of any involvement (or investment) we have in the proceedings.  The film's running time (99 minutes) feels twice as long as it actually is. 

Mr. Allen was at his sterling best in the 1970s ("Annie Hall, "Manhattan"), great in the 80s ("Hannah And Her Sisters", "Crimes And Misdemeanors"), decent in the 90s ("Husbands And Wives") and okay in 2005 ("Match Point").  In between these films the results are varied echoes of past glories.  The expediency and efficiency of the filmmaking landscape has changed drastically for the New York City-based director in recent years.  The expense of filming in most American states has meant Mr. Allen has often ventured abroad over the last ten years to film his movies at a lower cost (London, Barcelona, Paris.)  Still, even with those cost-cutting measures, films like the award-winning "Vicky Cristina Barcelona" were sub-par. 

"You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger" affords one or two chuckles but little else.  None of the characters are especially memorable, nor is the film's treatment on Blu-Ray.  Presented in full-frame 1.78:1 and in 1080p video, the disc's only extras are the film's trailer and a trailer for the current release "Barney's Version".  The Blu-Ray comes with English and French language audio, as well as English and French subtitles.  Only Mr. Allen's unwavering die-hard fans will find something to love and admire about his latest film.

I've appreciated a fair amount of Mr. Allen's work (including the 1972 film "Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex But Were Afraid To Ask"), but have been indifferent to many other films he's directed.  Sadly, "You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger" is one of them.

With: Ewen Bremner, Christian McKay.

On Blu-Ray and DVD in the U.S. and Canada on Tuesday, February 15. 

"You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger" is rated R by the Motion Picture Association of America for some language.  The film's running time is one hour and 39 minutes.


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